Oct 7, 2013 |
While in the convent, my class read Introduction to the Devout Life by St. Francis de Sales. I had read this book a few times in my life before the convent and I was excited to read it again. If you have never read it, it is one of those books where you notice so many “new” things each time you read it.
Because my class was reading it together, we discussed it at times during recreation. One of the parts that some of us had difficulty understanding discussed abjection. What exactly does abjection mean? If you look up “abject” in the dictionary it says:
- utterly wretched or hopeless
- miserable; forlorn; dejected
- indicating humiliation; submissive: an abject apology
- contemptible; despicable; servile: an abject liar
In this section St. Francis de Sales discusses accepting and even cherishing abjection. (If you want to read this section, you can read it here). I feel that the time after one leaves the religious life is a perfect time to put this into practice. But why do I say that?
When you live as a sister or nun in a religious community you are poor. You know that going in and you are happy about it! When people hear about what you are doing, they generally respect you for it. “Oh Sister, let me buy some food for you!” If your habit is getting a little tattered and stained, someone might offer to purchase material for you so you can make a new one. If you run out of gas because you are lost and don’t have money to buy more, it is probably pretty easy for a stranger to stop and fill up the tank for a woman in a religious habit. If someone spits on you in the subway, you’ll know it’s because you’re a woman religious and you can joyfully accept “all for Jesus!”
But what about when you return to the world? You are still poor. But it’s different. It’s abject poverty. When you go out wearing the same clothes every day because you only have one outfit, people might notice and judge you. If you run out of gas, will anyone stop and help you? If you can’t look quite “together” for your job interview, will you get the job? If someone sends a rude gesture in your direction for no apparent reason, how will you handle that?
St. Francis de Sales encourages us to use these situations as opportunities for growth. Sure, it’s easier said than done. But God allows every situation in our life for our sanctification. Even if we felt that being in the convent was our path to holiness, it isn’t right now because we are in the world. This isn’t easy to accept, but it is worth considering and taking to prayer. May God bless you!
by Jane F.
Sep 30, 2013 |
Was it just me, or did returning from the convent leave you feeling like a turtle standing there without a shell?
| awk.ward (ak-werd)-Not graceful; ungainly.-Not dexterous; clumsy.-Clumsily or unskillfully performed: –Difficult to handle or manage:-Marked by or causing embarrassment or discomfort: |
For me, the only thing more awkward than sitting in the airport on my way home wearing my knee-highs and clunky “nun-shoes,” with no one to talk to and nothing to make me look distracted or less lonely than my breviary and rosary, was facing EVERYONE…because even though people are understanding, nobody understands.
Why am I awkward? Let’s face it, I’ve probably always been a bit different. The fact that my idea of the perfect life was vowing and embracing the evangelical counsels; the exact opposite of that which the world tells us will make us happy, attests to this. Sex, money and power anyone? No thanks, I could really go for a life long commitment of chastity, poverty and obedience… What?
The thing is, the more I became graceful and comfortable living the religious life the more I became clumsy and uncomfortable in the secular world. In some ways I think it just had to do with the fact that I wasn’t used to being exposed to the world anymore. I was used to modesty, silence and prayer, study and recreation, a schedule and a community of women striving for holiness and love. All of a sudden I came crashing into the immodest, noisy, chaotic and selfish world that I had previously escaped. All of a sudden I felt scandalized and uncomfortable by everything around me.
However, now that I’ve been back in the world even longer than I was in the convent and now that I’m well exposed to the world and I don’t feel scandalized and embarrassed at every moment, I think that it’s still important to be awkward. We should be graceful and skillful women of Christ but awkward to sin and the secular world. Lets not get comfortable with that which the world offers but rather keep striving for chastity, poverty and obedience according to our state in life.
Be the woman who is modest in speech, dress and behavior. Be the woman who lives simply, tithes and gives to charity. Be the woman who lives the Gospel and is obedient and docile to her priest or spiritual director and to her employer. Be the woman who holds mankind in her heart and offers her life in love for the salvation of souls. Be the awkward light that catches the attention of sinners and makes them feel uncomfortable. Be the light that makes the roaches run and scatter. Be the light that awakens the sleeping. Be the light that expels darkness.
Lord, give us the grace to be awkward! Amen
by Cora Cantata
Aug 26, 2013 |
As many of you know, Pope Francis announced on July 5 that JP2 and Bl. John XXIII will soon be canonized.
I recently read a biography about the life of Pope John XXIII (Angelo Roncalli). The book was filled with beautiful and interesting stories about his life. One that struck me in a particular way was about his niece Enrica. She was in the convent for a little over a year, fell ill and had to withdraw. When he heard this, he wrote her a note, knowing that she was having difficulty being back in the world.
“My dear niece Enrica, a word for you alone. You have already shed enough tears. Shed no more but be happy and content in the Lord. If the Lord requires something else of you he will make his voice heard clearly and loudly. Holiness consists not in penances and extraordinary practices but in seeking in all things the Lord’s will, in obedience and humility.” (“I Will Be Called John” by Lawrence Elliott, page 156)
Enrica later said “his letter made it possible for me to accept myself.” I find the last part such a great reminder that God is calling us to holiness here and now. Many people think that one has to go to the convent/monastery/etc. in order to be holy. But if God has brought you back to the world (even if it’s for a short time), it is because this is part of the path to holiness for you.
St. Josemaria Escriva was a strong proponent of holiness in daily life, and that is the purpose of Opus Dei (which he founded). If you haven’t heard of it, I would encourage you to learn more!
If you are having a hard time adjusting, I would encourage you to ask the intercession of Bl. John XXIII, St. Josemaria Escriva and Leonie Martin.
Here is a newly approved prayer to Leonie:
Dear Leonie our Sister,
You have already intervened with God on our behalf,
and we would like to be able to pray to you officially,
so that many more might know you.
Come to the aid of parents who risk losing a child,
as you nearly died at a very young age.
Continue to uphold the families
where different generations have problems living together in peace.
Enlighten youth who question their future and hesitate to commit.
Show to all the way of prayer
which permits you to bear your limitations and your difficulties with confidence,
and to give yourself to others.
Lord, if such is your will,
deign to accord us the grace that we ask of you
through the intercession of your servant Leonie,
and inscribe her among the number of the venerable of your Church.
Through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen.
Imprimatur: March 25, 2012
Jean-Claude Boulanger
Bishop of Bayeux-Lisieux
By Pinkie
Aug 14, 2013 |
On August 13, 2013 we hosted a live chat to discuss the experience of leaving the religious life or seminary. We had a lively conversation with many beautiful insights. We touched on topics like asking for help, not feeling alone and how to be a friend, among others. Please write any comments below! We hope you enjoy watching it!
Jul 15, 2013 |
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” ~ Theodore Roosevelt
(Excerpt from the speech “Citizenship In A Republic” delivered at the Sorbonne, in Paris, France on 23 April, 1910)
I don’t know about you, but this quotation inspires me and gives me a lot of hope!
When I returned from the religious life, I felt judged by many people, including myself.
“How could I have been so stupid?”
“Why did you give all of your things away?”
“Of course you weren’t good enough.”
Etc.
Yet, I tried. And so did you.
If we wouldn’t have tried, would we have wondered the rest of our lives, “What if?”
I have my good days and my bad days. But even on my bad days I can’t kick myself for not trying.
And that’s pretty awesome.
by Pinkie.
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