Jan 21, 2014 |
“Take, O Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will. Whatever I have or hold Thou has given me; I restore it all to Thee, and surrender it wholly to be governed by Thy will. Give me only Thy love and Thy grace, and I am rich enough to ask for nothing more.”
—St. Ignatius of Loyola
On entering a convent, you surrender your life to God. On leaving a convent, even more so, you surrender your will as well. All of your plans, your desires, your hopes, your dreams, your struggles, your perseverance: these now seem completely pointless. You wonder if they meant anything at all.
The truth is: THEY DO!!!
What dearer things to your heart do you have to offer your Beloved than these? Only your will is fully yours; surrender that, and we have given Him everything!
It is hard to imagine that we could be happy while following a path that is different than what we originally wanted. But His path (this “road to Calvary” really), is your path to holiness, to Union with Him, which was the whole purpose of your having entered Religious Life in the first place!
What is Religious Life if not a gradual surrendering of our will in order to become conformed to His, and thus enter into complete union with Him? When He called you out of the convent, He desired to quicken that process. He did not wish to wait any longer to possess you entirely. Therefore, you are still called to this union; you are still called to give yourself entirely to Him; you are still His beloved Bride!
Now you have given Him your memories, understanding, your time, your work, your obedience, poverty, and chastity, your religious family, customs, and life: wait and see what He does with them, because He was the one who had given them to you for a time. You’ve grown, you’ve loved, you’ve surrendered; this is the image of His life on earth.
You are not as far as you think from living in a perfect imitation of Jesus’ life, which is the true “Religious Life.”
One word I must speak to You tonight,
In it is summed up in my heart’s prayer.
In it is my sorrow, joy, desires, love,
Gifts, pleasures, temptations, illness;
Ah, Jesus, everything!
I will not moan or groan at Your Hand,
Only Your will, my Jesus, is my own.
I have nothing to give, I am empty.
So take my whole soul, my yes,
My fiat.
by Rachel.
Dec 2, 2013 |
That I Can Do In The World (To Make My Life Better)
Be disciplined about time:
When the bell rang, we stopped what we were doing and moved onto the next thing. It didn’t matter if you were in the middle of a great story, having an awesome prayer time, etc. It was time to go. In my life this would add a lot of sanity if I have the discipline to do it. If I tell myself I will read for 15 minutes, do email for 5 minutes, then clean for 20 minutes, etc. I would get so many different things done. Instead I get sucked into tasks and neglect the others. Or I stay up too late so I am tired and grouchy the next day.
Communicate with family:
It was stressed that we needed to write to our family regularly. Because of that, I wrote my grandparents (and parents) often. And it was such a blessing. I didn’t make it a priority in the world because there were so many other tasks vying for my attention. But in the convent we knew that Sunday afternoon was time to write. What a gift! There is something very beautiful about a letter arriving in your mailbox because it is so intentional.
Sometimes I just need to move on:
When there would be a misunderstanding in the convent, it was hard to find time to talk things out because we observed silence for most of the day. I had such a desire to explain myself to others or find out why they did what they did, etc. But we really couldn’t do that, and it was often a blessing. I don’t need to explain myself all of the time or tell others why what they just did hurt me or annoyed me, etc. Quite often I would forget about whatever was such a big deal when I finally had an opportunity to talk about it.
Choose your words:
Having so much silent time made the opportunities for talking to my sisters precious. I was very intentional about my conversation and I started to see how much useless talking goes on in our lives. Now that I am back in the world, there are many times where random things pop into my head. I could share these thoughts in conversation, but I just choose not to say them.
Make reading a priority:
We had 30 minutes of designated spiritual reading time every day. Because of that, I blazed through a ton of great books. If I even dedicated half that amount of time to reading spiritual books now that would be awesome.
Don’t hit snooze:
When the bell rang at 5am we had to get out of bed. It was just part of life. The day was so productive because we got up and got moving.
The importance of recreation/free time:
It was part of our schedule because it is important. I felt good after exercising and spending time with my sisters!
Being flexible:
We had a schedule but sometimes things came up: random mission trip, etc. It’s easy to get bent out of shape when you have your day planned and then a monkey wrench comes in. But in the convent it was easy to view it as “God’s will.” I can do that in the world too!
Portion control and lack of sweets:
You couldn’t over eat or overindulge because certain foods weren’t available at all or in large quantities. What a gift!
How to take a fast shower:
It is possible!
A tidy room is pleasant:
My cell was calm because there wasn’t a bunch of junk lying around.
Sit up straight and smile:
The importance of good posture and a joyful countenance was very obvious in the convent!
by: Maria Goretti
Oct 7, 2013 |
While in the convent, my class read Introduction to the Devout Life by St. Francis de Sales. I had read this book a few times in my life before the convent and I was excited to read it again. If you have never read it, it is one of those books where you notice so many “new” things each time you read it.
Because my class was reading it together, we discussed it at times during recreation. One of the parts that some of us had difficulty understanding discussed abjection. What exactly does abjection mean? If you look up “abject” in the dictionary it says:
- utterly wretched or hopeless
- miserable; forlorn; dejected
- indicating humiliation; submissive: an abject apology
- contemptible; despicable; servile: an abject liar
In this section St. Francis de Sales discusses accepting and even cherishing abjection. (If you want to read this section, you can read it here). I feel that the time after one leaves the religious life is a perfect time to put this into practice. But why do I say that?
When you live as a sister or nun in a religious community you are poor. You know that going in and you are happy about it! When people hear about what you are doing, they generally respect you for it. “Oh Sister, let me buy some food for you!” If your habit is getting a little tattered and stained, someone might offer to purchase material for you so you can make a new one. If you run out of gas because you are lost and don’t have money to buy more, it is probably pretty easy for a stranger to stop and fill up the tank for a woman in a religious habit. If someone spits on you in the subway, you’ll know it’s because you’re a woman religious and you can joyfully accept “all for Jesus!”
But what about when you return to the world? You are still poor. But it’s different. It’s abject poverty. When you go out wearing the same clothes every day because you only have one outfit, people might notice and judge you. If you run out of gas, will anyone stop and help you? If you can’t look quite “together” for your job interview, will you get the job? If someone sends a rude gesture in your direction for no apparent reason, how will you handle that?
St. Francis de Sales encourages us to use these situations as opportunities for growth. Sure, it’s easier said than done. But God allows every situation in our life for our sanctification. Even if we felt that being in the convent was our path to holiness, it isn’t right now because we are in the world. This isn’t easy to accept, but it is worth considering and taking to prayer. May God bless you!
by Jane F.
Sep 30, 2013 |
Was it just me, or did returning from the convent leave you feeling like a turtle standing there without a shell?
| awk.ward (ak-werd)-Not graceful; ungainly.-Not dexterous; clumsy.-Clumsily or unskillfully performed: –Difficult to handle or manage:-Marked by or causing embarrassment or discomfort: |
For me, the only thing more awkward than sitting in the airport on my way home wearing my knee-highs and clunky “nun-shoes,” with no one to talk to and nothing to make me look distracted or less lonely than my breviary and rosary, was facing EVERYONE…because even though people are understanding, nobody understands.
Why am I awkward? Let’s face it, I’ve probably always been a bit different. The fact that my idea of the perfect life was vowing and embracing the evangelical counsels; the exact opposite of that which the world tells us will make us happy, attests to this. Sex, money and power anyone? No thanks, I could really go for a life long commitment of chastity, poverty and obedience… What?
The thing is, the more I became graceful and comfortable living the religious life the more I became clumsy and uncomfortable in the secular world. In some ways I think it just had to do with the fact that I wasn’t used to being exposed to the world anymore. I was used to modesty, silence and prayer, study and recreation, a schedule and a community of women striving for holiness and love. All of a sudden I came crashing into the immodest, noisy, chaotic and selfish world that I had previously escaped. All of a sudden I felt scandalized and uncomfortable by everything around me.
However, now that I’ve been back in the world even longer than I was in the convent and now that I’m well exposed to the world and I don’t feel scandalized and embarrassed at every moment, I think that it’s still important to be awkward. We should be graceful and skillful women of Christ but awkward to sin and the secular world. Lets not get comfortable with that which the world offers but rather keep striving for chastity, poverty and obedience according to our state in life.
Be the woman who is modest in speech, dress and behavior. Be the woman who lives simply, tithes and gives to charity. Be the woman who lives the Gospel and is obedient and docile to her priest or spiritual director and to her employer. Be the woman who holds mankind in her heart and offers her life in love for the salvation of souls. Be the awkward light that catches the attention of sinners and makes them feel uncomfortable. Be the light that makes the roaches run and scatter. Be the light that awakens the sleeping. Be the light that expels darkness.
Lord, give us the grace to be awkward! Amen
by Cora Cantata
Aug 14, 2013 |
On August 13, 2013 we hosted a live chat to discuss the experience of leaving the religious life or seminary. We had a lively conversation with many beautiful insights. We touched on topics like asking for help, not feeling alone and how to be a friend, among others. Please write any comments below! We hope you enjoy watching it!
Be disciplined about time:
While in the convent, my class read Introduction to the Devout Life by St. Francis de Sales. I had read this book a few times in my life before the convent and I was excited to read it again. If you have never read it, it is one of those books where you notice so many “new” things each time you read it.
Was it just me, or did returning from the convent leave you feeling like a turtle standing there without a shell?
On August 13, 2013 we hosted a live chat to discuss the experience of leaving the religious life or seminary. We had a lively conversation with many beautiful insights. We touched on topics like asking for help, not feeling alone and how to be a friend, among others. Please write any comments below! We hope you enjoy watching it!
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